By Lori Lines
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The Inescapable Call of Shadow Work:
Exploring the Necessity of Shadow Integration

Who wants to walk in the shadows when you can bask in the sun? That is how some people view shadow work. It doesn’t help their perception that they associate shadow work with encountering bad, ugly, shameful aspects of themselves. When, in fact, the shadow self doesn’t have to be the unsightly, unwanted pieces of self that one would rather forget, if we willingly commit to the shadow integration process. With a healthy approach to shadow work, the shadow is better understood as parts of oneself that become recessed and hidden from our conscious experience. Because to truly bask in the sun means being fully exposed!
 
Why We Need Shadow Work
We journey from lifetime to lifetime to ascend to the 4th and 5th levels of consciousness. This is done by consciously choosing the path of spiritual growth to achieve higher awareness, consciousness, and vibration, along with more profound compassion and unconditional love for the self and others.
 
This requires we release limiting beliefs and emotional wounds, relinquish the victim role, respond to our triggers with healing instead of reacting, and move through the world with authenticity and personal integrity. This is all made possible through reconciliation with the shadow self, making it an integral part of the journey of ascension.

Only through acknowledging, accepting, and embracing the shadow self can we rediscover self-love, higher awareness, total presence in the present, and oneness with the collective and the Divine that are the stepping stones to ascension.
 
Oneness Through Integration
Oneness with the collective and the Universe starts with oneness within. Because if we are fragmented within ourselves, how can we resonate with the unity and harmony of ascension? When we have not reconciled with the shadow self, we view ourselves as a disjointed assembly of good and evil, shadow and light, loveable and unlovable, and so on. This holds us at odds with ourselves.
 
Once you begin the process of soul integration, you will realize that you are whole, lovable, and Divine in yourself. Only then can one stop judging people based on one’s own measure of good and evil or worthy and unworthy and start seeing others as whole, lovable, Divine beings. 

Shadow work is the process by which we overcome the conditioned perspective of good and bad, better and worse, us and them, and the like. As the soul integrates, so too does the collective, making shadow work an essential toll station on the road to ascension.

Unavoidable By Design
To those who ask, why can't I be happy and high-vibing without doing shadow work? One might say, “Just try and see!” You see, by Divine design, shadow work is an inescapable process. Of course, one can put it off and avoid it, but this would lead to a stagnant, painful life during which one would encounter the same heartaches, failures, losses, and wounds in perpetuity, never learning but always hurting.
 
The shadow will keep restlessly stirring, contributing to dysfunction, cultivating crises, and reacting instead of responding to triggers, which often only worsen things. One way or another, the shadow self is determined to make itself known and be acknowledged. It will continue to rise to the surface until it is integrated and healed in preparation for ascension.
 
Not until we acknowledge, accept, love, heal, and integrate the shadow self can we be authentically “happy and high-vibing.” Until then, one is destined to keep going in circles, making the same mistakes in different contexts, and meeting the same person in different personifications.
 
Therefore, shadow work may be avoidable, but it is inherently inescapable. To ascend, we must be complete, view others as whole, and achieve unity with the collective. This can only be accomplished when we stop running and commit to becoming integrated again. Because this isn’t a new state of being for you, it is a return to how your soul has been and will be for eternity.
 
Ascension Begins Where Polarity Ends
We’re conditioned from the beginning to exist in a polarized place, and we need to move out of this to integration to achieve ascension. In the spaces between you and them, shadow and light, enlightened and unenlightened, negativity such as limiting beliefs, egoic masks, derision, and “otherness” fester. Not until we understand and manifest the continuity of energy, soul, and love between everyone and everything can we elevate to a 5th-dimensional consciousness.

In the same way that avoiding shadow work is a self-perpetuating vicious cycle, soul integration begins a self-propelling process of increasing vibrations as you release who you are not and rise toward who you truly are. Understand that shadow work is not a deviation or a delay along the journey of ascension but a stepping stone. Just as soul integration elevates your consciousness and raises your vibration, reunifying with the collective is the natural progression of shadow work and another step up on the ascent toward enlightenment.
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Final Thoughts…
Shadow work will always seem daunting, perhaps unachievable, when we look at it from a 3rd-dimensional consciousness projecting itself into the 5D. Instead, try to look at shadow work with a 5th-dimensional consciousness looking back at themselves in the 3D (as best you can).  From this higher vantage point, shadow work seems like such a small effort for such an expansive state of being. What would you do to experience the greatest joy, freedom, and love you have ever known?
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“The awakening is the purpose. The awakening of the fact that, in essence, we are light, we are love...”  - Dolores Cannon

In love and truth,
​Lori Lines

By Lori Lines

Self-realization, the fully realized self, self-actualization; Just the vibrational frequency of these words has an energetic charge! Many of us are under the impression that we should strive toward self-realization, but what does it really mean? How do we achieve it? And what is the fully realized self capable of?

Think of someone you know whose mood swings between disingenuous, cheerful bravado and mopey apathy. They become helpless and hopeless at the sign of minor obstacles, causing them to move through life like a rudderless ship tossed by the storm; This is what a total lack of self-realization looks like. This is the fully unrealized self.

Next, visualize yourself feeling empowered, peaceful, and present. Motivated by life’s obstacles, eager to problem solve, challenge your aptitudes, and learn new skills. You feel untethered, courageous, and excited about what life offers; This is a glimpse at your fully realized self. Radiant, emboldened, and aligned.
 
Who is the Fully Realized Self?
Countless definitions and criteria have been used to conceptualize a fully realized being. All the descriptions share two principles, wholeness and freedom. Actualized individuals successfully integrate their shadow and their light. They view themselves as whole and complete; no aspects of their personhood are relegated to the shadows out of fear, shame, or self-denial.
 
As complete beings, they are detached from the temporaneous aspects of the physical world, like material wealth or lack, accomplishments, or failures. They do not attach themselves through codependent relations nor burden themselves with the stress or anxiety they have been conditioned to identify with.
 
This is possible because when one is complete unto themselves, they do not need to identify with or attach themselves to other people, circumstances, or things in search of a shallow, fleeting sense of fulfillment and completion.

To be fully realized is to align with the infinite nature of Spirit, the unconditional love of the Divine, and the boundless potential of being. The fully realized individual is unburdened, unbothered, and unlimited!

How Do We Achieve Self-Realization?
The five fundamental precepts of the fully realized self are

Awareness
Authenticity
Acceptance
Amity
Authority

To have awareness is to be in control of one’s thoughts. This doesn’t suggest one should have a stranglehold on their thoughts. Instead, it is a healthy stream of consciousness uncluttered by negative ruminations or nervous chatter. An individual who is aware is present and clear-headed yet inspired and creative. They allow their thoughts to flow but can quickly identify and release distractions. 

Living authentically begins with awareness. It is essential to know who you are before you can accept yourself in totality. Once self-acceptance is achieved, integrity is naturally cultivated; knowing who you are gives you an innate understanding of who you are not. The actualized being lives a life that exemplifies their integrity, and their personal truth leads them.

Having accepted their truth and who they are, the fully realized individual possesses a wealth of self-love. A healthy sense of self-love dictates awareness of and alignment with Universal love and Divine love. This, in turn, fosters a sense of equality with others and love for all members of the collective.

Authority is synonymous with accountability. Actualized people hold themselves accountable for their actions and outcomes, confidently exercising their sovereign will and personal freedom. To be fully realized means abandoning the “blame game” and instead, from the depths of self-knowledge, finding solutions that speak to one’s aptitudes and strengths.

Acceptance grows from the fertile foundation of awareness, authenticity, amity, and authority. Absent anxious mental chatter, ego defenses, animosity, negativity, and limiting beliefs, there is no place for avoidance, denial, or unhealthy coping; the only reasonable path is acceptance and the peace, understanding, and surrender that follows.
 
Why Would One Seek Fully Realization?
To be clear, the journey of the self-actualized being is not absent of challenges, obstacles, strife, or discomfort. The fully realized experience is absent suffering in that suffering often results from identifying with a temporary circumstance outside of oneself or the temporality of pain within oneself. Because full realization often goes hand in hand with nonattachment, the potential for suffering is minimal.

The actualized being often lives a life of peace and relative ease as they have found acceptance. They no longer resist change or resent their circumstances. Instead, the realized individual seeks wisdom, solutions, and opportunities, flowing with the current as opposed to swimming against it. They know that if one path isn’t working, they are not being victimized or punished but redirected and repositioned toward their true, intended path.

Subsequently, one who is fully realized lives a life of hope and positivity, not toxic, feigned positivity, but overarching contentment fostered by a higher perspective and nonattachment to life’s trials and impermanent worries and concerns. The fully realized being, by definition, cannot be, and will not consent to victimization and oppression! If they are displeased with their circumstances, they know they possess the empowerment and confidence to accept, change or leave the undesirable conditions.

Final Thoughts - The Ultimate “Life Hack”
Hacks and shortcuts seem to be de rigor today, but unlike most clickbait, achieving self-realization is genuinely the most efficient strategy for living an efficient, successful life! By truly knowing who you are, you better understand what you need and want. Moreover, by fully accepting and knowing your strengths and weaknesses, you can plot your unique and most effective path to achieve and manifest your goals and intentions.
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To achieve full self-realization is like having wings. You gain a higher perspective and greater proximity to the wisdom, love, and peace of the Divine, rising above the noise and negativity of the matrix so that you may soar through life basking in the sun-like glow of peace, joy, and prosperity.  

In love and truth,
Lori Lines

By Lori Lines

As we move into a new Era, we (most of the collective) have entered the fourth dimension, which marks a necessary quantum leap for humanity. It is time for us to take a quantum leap in our consciousness and embrace the fourth dimensional reality. This requires us to gain a fifth dimensional understanding that invites light into our lives. We must transition from the third dimensional Piscean world to the edges of a whole new world.

For centuries, we have been living in a world having three dimensions - length, width, and height. However, the theory says space has three spacial dimensions and one dimension of time - the fourth dimension. The four-dimensional universe is a concept that paints general relativity, which explains gravity as a curvature of space-time.

As we have entered the fourth dimension, the transition phase of our evolution has begun. Our reality is no longer limited to the fluctuating third-dimensional patterns and creations that we have been accustomed to. Now, we can operate in three dimensions while expanding our awareness to include the fourth dimension.

This expansion means that our dimensional patterns will fluctuate, and it will involve awareness of multi-dimensional space and its various kinds. Choice is now available to change how we perceive space and dimensional space.

By allowing our subconscious mind to come to the fore, we are able to tap into the consciousness of the fourth dimension, which changes our awareness and consciousness in the third dimension plane.

It is important to recognize that awareness travels and passes through different states, which can take some time and patience as this transition occurs within. This means that our awareness states affect not only our mind but also our intellect, our emotions, and how we experience events in our lives.

As we progress through dimensions towards the seventh dimension and beyond into the astral plane, changes in flow become more apparent. Opening to learning these new concepts involves a choice to change how we perceive space and dimensional space.

This phase of our evolution is a concept that highlights the need for a strong third dimension in order to see the vast space containing the physical universe. As three-dimensional beings, we are confined to experiencing reality within three dimensional space, but by tapping into pure inner space and superconsciousness, we have the potential to expand our dimensional capacity.

This allows our evolving consciousness to transcend higher dimensions and alter our perception of reality beyond physical earth embodiments. Learning involves the understanding we have a choice to change how we perceive space and dimensional space by visualizing ourselves in different picture layers and following subtle directions from our superconsciousness.

By doing so, we can begin to break down the boundaries of perception that hold us back from experiencing higher dimensions where events occur beyond the limitations of our body and physical realm.

In other words, if you are not already experiencing this, you will begin to experience your other lives because your awareness is bleeding into the other dimensions where you reside. You may be doing a mundane task when, all of a sudden, your awareness is diverted to a life you are experiencing on another dimension from the current timeline. It may appear like a daydream but the FEELING will be more pronounced as you experience it.

How to navigate this? Get MINDFUL. Meditate. Practice PRESENCE. That way, you will not feel as if you are losing your mind. Know it's just a new state of being and your body is attempting to acclimate to this new way of perceiving reality.
It's OK! It's why we are HERE! To ground and to bring in New Earth.

In love and truth,
​Lori Lines

By Lori Lines

To know if you are living in the 3rd dimension, it's essential to understand that there's a 4 and 5D reality. The 5th dimension of awareness is where things like unconditional love, compassion, and oneness exist. In contrast, the dimension 4D reality is where time and space become more fluid with the understanding we create our reality. In addition, I see the 4th dimension as a space of transitional choice. The 3rd dimension of consciousness is where most people exist, but as one elevates their consciousness, they move towards the fifth dimension of awareness. This shift happens when the soul takes over instead of being ruled by the material world of body/feelings, judgment, rules, etc…


To know if you are living in the third dimension, you need to understand what third-dimensional consciousness is. It's a state of being where we are only aware of our physical reality and the limitations that come with it. However, as we evolve, we start experiencing multiple dimensions and become more aware of our thoughts and emotions. The fifth dimension is the next step in this evolution, where we operate at a higher frequency known as 5th dimension frequency.


To know if you are living in the third dimension, pay attention to your emotions and intellectual theory. The third dimension is dominated by self-created thoughts and feelings, which can entangle your awareness through attachment to people and narratives. In a rapidly changing world, it's easy to get lost in the endless cinema of our thoughts and emotions. However, our nervous system response is an indicator that we are living in the third dimension. As the third dimension gains prominence, we tend to compare ourselves with others and focus on what happens around us rather than our interaction with the world and our inner processes.


Living in the third dimension is an experience that we all go through. It is a reality where our perception is limited to our five senses, and we are bound by the Earth-bound laws of physics. We experience people and events around us, and these experiences shape our understanding of the world. However, it is important to understand that this reality is just one dimension of many. The fourth dimension adds time to the equation, while the fifth dimension involves movement in space-time. Knowing if you are living in the third dimension requires an awareness of your limitations and an understanding that your perception creates consciousness. To work with other dimensions, you must learn the truth about your existence, assist others in their journey toward truth and create concepts that allow for exploration beyond what your senses perceive. Living in higher dimensions allows for a fuller experience of life as it involves a greater understanding of consciousness and its role in shaping our reality.


Living in the 3rd dimension means having a virtuous inner life and a virtuous outer life. It is an important time for humanity as we are on the brink of making the jump to higher dimensions. Earth is one of the last holdouts, but more and more souls are beginning to rise up and join the bandwagon of ascension.

Signs of 3rd-Dimensional Reality
Physical sensations and experiences in the 3rd dimension are some of the most obvious signs that you are in this reality. In the 3rd dimension, we experience a physical body with all its limitations and sensations. We can touch, taste, smell, see, and hear everything around us through our physical senses. We also experience the passing of time as a linear progression from past to present to future.


In this dimension, our physical bodies are subject to gravity and other laws of physics that limit our movements and capabilities. We feel hunger, thirst, pain, pleasure, and all other sensations that come with having a physical form. Moreover, we experience separation from others and feel like individuals with distinct identities. We have ego-driven desires for material possessions, status, and power.


All these experiences are unique to the 3rd dimensional reality which is why it is called the realm of duality or separation consciousness. However, as we evolve spiritually, we can transcend these limitations and access higher dimensions of awareness beyond our physical senses. One of the signs that you are in the 3rd-dimensional reality is having a limited perception of time and space.


In this dimension, time is perceived as linear and limited, with a past, present and future. People tend to live their lives based on schedules and deadlines, feeling rushed or pressured to complete tasks within specific time frames. Likewise, space is perceived as limited, with physical boundaries that cannot be easily crossed. This can lead to feelings of confinement or restriction.


In the 3rd dimension, people are also often limited by their five senses - sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell - which can only perceive a small fraction of the vast spectrum of energy that exists in the universe. This can limit one's ability to understand or interact with higher dimensions of reality. However, it's important to note that these limitations are not necessarily negative or limiting in themselves; they simply reflect the specific characteristics of this dimension. One of the signs that you are in a 3rd-dimensional reality is the emphasis on duality and separation.


In this dimension, we often see things as black or white, good or bad, right or wrong. This type of thinking can lead to a sense of separation from others and the world around us. We may view ourselves as separate from nature, animals, and even other humans. In a 3rd dimensional reality, we also tend to place a lot of emphasis on material possessions and external factors such as status and power.


This focus on external validation can create a sense of competition and comparison with others. However, as we move towards higher dimensions, we begin to shift away from this dualistic way of thinking. We start to see everything as interconnected and interdependent. We recognize that there is no true separation between ourselves and the world around us.

​By becoming more aware of our thoughts and beliefs about duality and separation, we can begin to shift towards a more holistic perspective that honors the interconnectedness of all things. One of the signs that you are living in a 3rd-dimensional reality is an attachment to material possessions and external validation.


In love and truth,

​Lori Lines

By Lori Lines

In today’s mass media culture, we are often flooded by a current of opinions, reflections, and perspectives. Go on any social media platform right now, and your feed will be awash with the statuses of celebrities, politicians, friends, family, coworkers, and acquaintances far removed, like your brother’s high school girlfriend or someone in your spouse’s softball league; Do you genuinely need their political opinion?
 
Many, if not most, of these opinions or responses could be left unsaid. Still, once they are presented to the masses, they will surely offend someone. And, inevitably, someone’s offense will offend someone else. Then, the original poster may apologize, and either someone will find an issue with the tone of the apology or the motivation to apologize in the first place.

Don’t Take it Personally
People tend to take it personally when they see or hear something offensive. People will say, “that is offensive!” But what they feel is, “you have offended me!” They confuse their personal feelings with the feeling of being personally targeted. When the truth is, it is rarely personal. 

We’ve begun with social media as an example—such as the off-the-cuff quip about a foolish politician. It is easier, at least for some, to take a step back and realize that despite feeling personally offended, the comment was not personal. Yet, what of the family member who reacts to your disinterest in having children by saying, “no family is complete without kids,” or the co-worker who assumes that “you don’t mind filling in for me because it’s not like anyone needs you”? These instances could be a little harder to distance oneself from. However, the family member may be unconsciously voicing their desire for children. Or the co-worker could be envisioning what it would be like if they had no children. 

Be the Observer
To see things as they are, as opposed to how your ego, trauma, or conditioning has framed them, is to question the underlying intention of the offensive behavior, speech, or situation. Depending on your approach, it can be a fascinating exploration, like reflecting on a piece of artwork; Why did the artist use that color, put the brush stroke there, or paint that person or object? In other words, why did that person say those words, use that tone, choose that action, or express those emotions? When you look at an “offense” as something outside of yourself, it is easier to observe it objectively and create distance from it emotionally.
 
When observing the offense instead of internalizing it, you can see beyond the ego mask and witness someone’s wounds and trauma. Take, for instance, the friend that has nothing good to say about your partner, “you shouldn’t trust him,” “he isn’t good for you,” or “he’s going to let you down”; instead of being offended, imagine how she must have been let down by her partners or possibly family or friends, that would cause her to say such disheartening things. With enough consciousness and willingness, you will soon see how offensive behaviors and comments often call for a generous dose of love and compassion!

Rise Above or Go Under
People who cannot override their trauma, ego, or conditioning remain easily offended. When we are easily offended, we get stuck in a vicious cycle of offense after offense until we program ourselves to seek reasons to be offended. Moving through life in a perpetual state of frustration, anger, hurt, disappointment, and angst won’t make unpleasant people, offensive words, or rude behavior any less likely or less objectionable; It will only lower your vibration, pollute your thoughts, and destabilize your emotions.
 
Worse still, people who get stuck in the victim stance end up forfeiting their power and sovereign authority. They identify as victims and view themselves as vulnerable, helpless, and doomed. So, what is the solution? The only way out of this cycle is to look within.

Never Stop Questioning
An impersonal perspective towards being offended helps us see that these offenses are where wounds are, whether they belong to the “offender” or the “offended.” When we witness the pain of others, we can cast the light of love and compassion on them. When we acknowledge our own trauma, we must reclaim our power and accountability. The first step is to ask what is being revealed, what needs to be recognized, and what requires healing.

To question creates possibility; to remain offended is limiting, pulling down your mood, vibration, and perspective until you are trapped in a prison of your own creation. You instantly lift your temperament, raise your vibration, and gain a higher, more objective perspective when you are willing to ask the right questions. Such as how I can show this person or myself more love, embrace forgiveness, and find the acceptance to move on.

The Most Important Questions
Ask yourself what this world would look like if nothing offended anyone. People who were intentionally distasteful or rude would get no response to fuel their behavior and instead be forced to examine their actions. Everyone else would enjoy a world of conscious thought, healing discourse, harmony, and compassion.
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Of course, each of us must do our part to create a world of love, unity, and peace. It begins the next time you feel offended; ask yourself a crucial question, how can you make the world a better place by choosing to see the world as a better place?

In love and truth,
Lori Lines

By Lori Lines

Are you an Empath?
Do you:
Pick up on other people’s moods and emotions? Whether you can observe the slightest change in their disposition or get the sense that you absorb their emotional state and take it on as your own.

Lose yourself in your relationship with someone else? This may be by trying to “heal” or take care of them, appease them, or “strengthen” the bond your share.
Experience sudden shifts of emotion or panic when you are in public? Such as window shopping with friends in a mall and suddenly experiencing a dizzying urge to run as far away as possible.

Get told that you really “get” people or have a profoundly comforting energy? You may be the one everyone turns to for advice or the shoulder everyone cries on.

Suffer physical or emotional sympathy pains for loved ones and strangers alike? For example, experiencing painful jabs watching violence on tv or shedding a tear at a loved one’s sadness.
 
Get strong hunches or vibes about people? You may know immediately if someone is lying, genuine, or afraid. Or have you experienced an instant distaste or affection for someone you just met?

Feel love for people or pets so deeply it hurts? Perhaps you have felt love for someone or something that you think can’t be contained in your heart and experienced the ache of its expansiveness.

Have the urge to help and heal every person and animal in need? Perhaps, you get overwhelmed that you can’t do more or by the healing mission you feel you have received.
 
While this isn’t an exhaustive list, if you answered yes to most or all these points, you are very likely an empath!

What is an Empath?
Surely, you have heard the term empath before, especially if you are one. However, much like “energy,” “grounding,” or “manifestation,” empath has become a term that is widely used but not always well understood. A derivative of empathy, being an empath is often viewed very favorably, like a superpower. However, when the term was coined, it was synonymous with being an “emotional sponge,” hinting at the many pitfalls of being an empath.

Empathic abilities can result from, and contribute to, a porous energy field. So, while it can be viewed as the gift of emotional intuition, helping empaths navigate and heal, in some cases, the world, it can also create a self-perpetuating cycle of poor energetic and relational boundaries, leaving empaths vulnerable to the people they often so desperately want to comfort and heal. 

Empaths have a gift; It is the gift of reading people and their emotions to intuitively understand others’ intentions, strengths, and weaknesses. This enables them to navigate the world with an inner knowing that can be used to their benefit. They can also identify the wounded and vulnerable, providing comfort and love as the empath feels called. 

Do you know who else has an intuitive understanding of others’ intentions, emotions, strengths, and weaknesses, enabling them to navigate the world with an inner knowing that can be used to their own benefit? Narcissists! They can also identify the wounded and vulnerable, but with disparate results.
 
What Is a Narcissist?
We’ve all encountered or perhaps gotten up close and personal with a narcissist by dating, being related to, or possibly working with them. Narcissists can be identified by:

Their over-inflated sense of importance. Such as the aunt who is “exhausted” from doing “everything” for the family during the holidays but wouldn’t have it any other way. Or the friend who monopolizes the conversation every Brunch Sunday.

A sense of entitlement. Like, the co-worker who feels childless people should give them their sick days or the parent who feels you should drop everything because they need you “now.”

The belief that the rules don’t apply to them. For example, the arrogant jerk at the grocery store who thinks he can just cut in the line.

An obsession with envy and admiration. These are the people that think everyone is jealous of them and want to be like them. For instance, the social media addict who obsesses over followers, “stalkers,” likes, “haters,” and “wannabes.”

Their preoccupation with success, influence, youth, beauty, and adoration. These people fight aging tooth and nail, put on airs about their financial success and power, and often act very out of touch with the “everyman.”

Their lack of compassion, empathy, and genuine connections. This is often due to exploiting people and having shallow, self-centered conversations. These people tend to explain their lack of meaningful relationships by emphasizing their high status or distinction because they are only understood by a select and chosen few.

The benefits of moving through the world from the narcissistic perspective are that they always prioritize and meet their own needs, never shrink from the spotlight because they feel lesser than others, and don’t relegate themselves to the masses. They make their own way!

Two Sides of the Same Coin
We may think it is easy to point out and separate narcissists from empaths. However, it is not so clear-cut. Being empathic, like being narcissistic, exists on a spectrum. We can all be somewhat selfish at times and empathetic at others. What’s more, sometimes being an empath is a matter of unhealthy coping, such as a trauma response, and being narcissistic is a matter of healthy coping, such as eschewing social norms for individual freedom and happiness. There is no clear villain and victim, villain and victor, or victim and victor. The unenlightened empath and the unenlightened narcissist form a toxic cycle in which they both exploit and enable. Take this scenario, for example:

• An unconscious empath is born of a traumatic childhood and identifies with learned helplessness and perpetual victimization. They have a fear of taking accountability for their outcomes and being rejected. 

• A narcissist who also bears the scars of trauma and identifies with a me-against-the-world and everyone-is-out-to-get-me perspective has a fear of being abandoned and robbed of control.

• When these two people meet, they find completion! Albeit a toxic form of completion...

• The empath has someone, the narcissist, whom they can hold accountable for their outcomes and won’t leave as long as the empath gives “unconditional love” and forfeits control.

 

• The narcissist has someone, the empath, who will let them take control and won’t leave as long as the narcissist “accepts and approves” of them. 

In this scenario, who is exploiting whom? The truth is that they are both exploiting each other and harming themselves by feeding into this vicious cycle propelled by triggers and trauma responses.

The Power Lies Within
The solution? Stop giving power away to others! When giving away the power to heal or wound, we immediately feed into a cycle of victim and abuser or used and user. In this context, there is no differentiation between “empath” and “narcissist.” Both individuals have unconsciously voided all boundaries of personhood and accountability. 

We all have the potential to abuse or be abused, no matter what end of the spectrum we are on. The only way to eliminate the potential for abuse is to become aware and make conscious personal choices. We cannot force anyone to change; we can only choose to strengthen our integrity and manifest our intentions, no one else’s. Ultimately, when we awaken to find ourselves in the role of either the abuser or abused, the only place to look is within.

Two Sides of the Mirror
Whether the empath or the narcissist seeks to heal and end exploitation, the only reason to look to the other is to see what is being reflected back. What does the empath see in the narcissist that feeds their need to sacrifice and submit? What does the narcissist see in the empath that triggers them to demand and deplete? And, above all, how can they nourish or silence this deep-seated hunger, finding stillness, healing, and wholeness from within?

Asking what inner work remains to be done, shadows remain uncovered, and needs remain un-self-fulfilled should always be the primary focus! To the empath, the narcissist is the mirror, and to the narcissist, the empath is the mirror; The mirror reflects how they need to acknowledge their trauma, accept accountability, and awaken to their power to shape their destiny. Is it time to take a long hard look in the mirror?

In Love and Truth,
​Lori Lines 
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